As we wrapped up my summer podcast series, BEcoming, I’ve been reflecting on the truth that as we BEcome, we often also UNBecome. This paradox is at the heart of midlife—a time of profound transformation where we are invited to let go of what no longer serves us and embrace the new opportunities that await.
This realization hit me hard this week as I watched my middle son and most of our household possessions drive off in a U-Haul headed across the country. This U-Haul is bringing my oldest two independence and a place of their own.
Here I am, UNBecoming a full-time mom. My boys are flying the nest, and with my youngest now fully licensed and independent, I’m no longer needed in the way I used to be. I’m no longer required for all the things I used to be needed for. They will always be my baby boys, but now they are independent young men. As I relinquish this role of full-time mom, I get to step into BEcoming more of myself. I’m getting this opportunity to care for myself in the way I have nurtured them all these years.
But this transition isn’t easy. The empty spaces in the house seem to echo with memories of the past—laughter, arguments, the day-to-day bustle of raising three boys. There’s a sense of loss, a mourning for the life that was, even as I’m excited for what’s to come. This is the duality of midlife: the bittersweet mix of letting go and welcoming in.
Midlife brings with it so many changes—physical, emotional, and spiritual. Our bodies no longer respond the way they used to. The energy we once took for granted now needs to be carefully managed. We’re faced with the undeniable truth that we’re aging, that time is moving forward whether we’re ready or not. For many of us, this is a time of recalibrating our identities. The roles we’ve played for decades—whether as mothers, partners, caregivers, or career women—start to shift. We find ourselves asking, “Who am I now?”
As we shed these layers of our past selves, there’s an opportunity to explore new parts of our identity. It’s a chance to rediscover passions that may have been put on hold, to invest time in self-care and personal growth, to BEcome the women we were always meant to be. But this process requires us to let go of the old stories we’ve told ourselves—the belief that our worth is tied to our roles, that our value diminishes as we age, that we need to be everything for everyone.
In UNBecoming the full-time mom, I’m BEcoming a woman who gets to decide what she wants to do with her time, who gets to explore her own desires and dreams. I’m stepping into a new phase of life where I get to put myself first, something that has felt foreign and, quite honestly, a little selfish. But isn’t that what midlife is about? Finding the balance between caring for others and caring for ourselves?
This journey is both exhilarating and terrifying. There’s a part of me that wants to cling to the familiar, to hold on to the roles that have defined me for so long. But there’s another part of me that’s eager to see what lies ahead, to explore the parts of myself that have been waiting in the wings.
For those of us in midlife, this dance of BEcoming and UNBecoming is our new reality. It’s a time of shedding the old and embracing the new, of finding the courage to step into uncharted territory. It’s about giving ourselves permission to grow, to evolve, to BEcome more of who we are meant to be.
So, as I watch my sons take flight, I’m choosing to see this not just as an ending, but as a new beginning. I’m choosing to see this as my time to soar, to explore, and to embrace the woman I’m BEcoming.
And if you’re finding yourself in a similar place, navigating the changes of midlife, remember that it’s okay to mourn what you’re letting go of. It’s okay to feel a little lost as you step into the unknown. But also know that there’s beauty in this process, that the woman you’re BEcoming is worth every step of the journey.
If you’re feeling overwhelmed by these changes or uncertain about the path ahead, I invite you to book a Virtual Holistic Harmony Embodiment session. Together, we can work on releasing the old, aligning with your true self, and embracing the new possibilities that midlife brings. Let’s explore this next chapter with open hearts and minds, and BEcome the women we were always meant to be.
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